Melancholy~

Assalamualaykum..
This post is dedicated to YOURS TRULY and a friend who [indirectly] introduced this song to me.
[I think you know who you are..I downloaded this song from your previous site.]
The song, "Tearjerker" is from a pop punk band, Fenix TX.
Please don't ask me who are they, because I also don't have a clue! =D
This song is the ONLY one from this band that I know and listen to.
Cherish the lyrics..

"Tearjerker" - Fenix TX

Picture's on the wall
Just waiting there to fall
Still remind me
That painful holiday
Can almost hear you say
Please don't miss me
Too long...

What did I do wrong
Could've sung a different song
You were my tune
Make my heart believe
A want is not a need
And I'm all right without you
The days go by
The nights don't change
The stars still spell out your name
I will wait for you..!!

The world has let me down
Is it you're just not around
I've lost my reason
All the memories
Every smile you gave to me
You can keep them
The days go by
The nights don't change
The stars still spell out your name

I will wait for you
I will wait for you
I will wait for you
I will wait for you

I will wait for days go by
And still I will wait for you

+++++++++++++++++++++

It makes me think of a very special person.
Whom I wish not to be reminded ever again.
But seeing his name in a friend's blog, makes my heart skipped a beat.
Knowing that he's doing alright with his life now.
And it hurts, thinking that we are not as close as we used to.
Damn I hate this feeling!
[Soooo "high school"...said Sereh.. =D]

Well, people..this is just my personal ramblings.
Suddenly I felt like sharing my melancholy mood today.
Hopefully it doesn't effect your mood..

Wassalam..

p/s : eD, I reduced the file size..hope they are not as irritating as before.. I kinda like my Sbox lah.. hehehe

e.n.d.

Dihimpit dicengkam rindu ini
Gerimis duka ku
Menggamit kenangan silam
Resah dan pilu menghampiri

Sunyinya malamku kelam
Pedih kemelut cinta
Dingin kelu bicara
Tuk mengungkap rindu

Sayang ku mungkir pada kejujuranmu
Menolak segala bahgia dihadapanku
Kasihku mungkir pada kata janjiku
Berlari aku jauh dari cintamu
Ku kesali

Dihanyut dilambung ombak lara
Sepiku berkelana
Melayari jiwa nestapa
Menggagahi rasa kesayuan

Leburlah harapan cinta
Namun kesetiaanmu
Kugenggam bagai hukuman
Mengheret langkahku

Maafkan daku
Kekasih hati cinta kita berakhir
Maafkan daku
Kerna ku memungkirinya

Maafkan daku
Kekasih hati cinta jadi begini
Maafkan daku
Ku mungkir bahagia

*****************************

Assalamualaykum!

Now that's one sad love song, isn't it?
I rekindle my love for this song after the recent Anugerah Juara Lagu.
Hazami did well with his intrepetation of the song, which made me cried a little. :(

Hrmmm...lately I've been hearing a lot about break-ups too..
And coming from people who are close to me, I didn't really know how to react.
I didn't know what was I supposed to tell them?
How to ask them to be patient in the nicest or most appropriate way..

News 1
A few days back, I received a text message from my best buddy, H, saying that his relationship with a friend of mine ended.
I felt sad for H, because I was hoping that they'll end up together one day.
I love both of them, and I think they complete each other.
But I'm glad H took it well, saying that they weren't meant to be together in the first place.
[I understand his reason, but it's better to be left unsaid here. Too personal.]

News 2
My housemate, Y, told me a shocking news.
Putus tunang. How sad is that?
They have been engaged for more than 2 years.
Orang tua-tua kata, bertunang jangan lama-lama.
In this case I sympathized Y because she had to learn this the hard way.
But knowing Y, I personally think the break-up was for the better.
Her ex-fiance had never portrayed himself like a husband would-be.
i.e, caring for my housemate when she was sick, wishing her birthday, getting to know her parents better, getting to know her friends better, share his problems with her etc.
All he did was making Y cried alone in her heart.
Don't you agree with me? That the break-up was a better option for her?

News 3
But the saddest of all was a message from my brother, telling me about his friend who passed away because of leukimia.
His friend, Allahyarham Rafizul Elmi a.k.a Ali (STAR 9296) is my senior's husband.
The whole of last week, my friends and I had been keeping in touch with each other to share the sad news.
I really can't find the right words to say to her, but we strongly hope that K. Nani (TKC 9296) will get through this dugaan dari Allah dengan hati yang tabah.
Al-fatihah.

But I envy H&Y.
That may sound selfish or rather harsh, or unappropriate, but frankly, I'm jealous.
Because, albeit the fact that they have broken up, at least they have been in love.
Once, twice, or in H's case, more than that.
Then again, it's just me being pathetic.

Wassalam.

WEIRD, am I??

Assalamualaykum.

On Monday, I received a text message from K Ruby saying that she has "tagged" me.
At that time I was clueless, so I just replied and promised that I would read her blog a.s.a.p.
Alas, I only managed to get online after my first class this morning.
Upon reading the post, I was dumbstrucked.

RULES: People who are tagged should write a blog post of 6 weird things about them as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave a comment that says 'you are tagged' in their comments and tell them to read your blog.

I HAVE TO LIST OUT 6 WEIRD THINGS ABOUT MYSELF.

Wohooooooooooooo..
The task sounded so simple as I was reading K Ruby's 'weird' habits.
But then I found myself thinking hard about my own list.
[Thinking of how to choose ONLY 6 out of I-don't-know-exactly-how-many weird things about me. LOL]
Well, I'll be a sport and take up K Ruby's challenge.

Here goes.....~

1. I cried while watching "Legally Blonde 2". [Seriously..]

2. If I didn't see my nephews and niece for a week or two, I'd cry when I listen to their voice over the phone. [Baru anak saudara ni, kalau anak sendiri nanti???]

3. Unlike K Ruby, I'm quite a fussy shopper. I took about 2 months surfing the net for the best specification and best deal before I bought my new handphone. And if I like something, I usually bought ONE, because I easily get bored with something. [Economy, maaa..]
But when I went out shopping with my girl friends, I told them to buy basically EVERYTHING that they like. [They like shopping with me anyway..LOL]

4. I like this guy for ages, but still, I haven't got the nerve to confess about my feelings to him. [Weird x? Weird la, these days mana ada orang malu² kucing, kan? huhuhuhu]

5. I could go to sleep at 4 am and woke up at the usual 6 am alarm, and teaching the kids as usual at 8 am. [But then Qada' tidur tak ingat dunia laa after that. hehehehe..]

6. I promised to update my blog on regular basis but failed everytime. Don't you think it's kinda 'W.E.I.R.D', K Ruby? [ROTFL]

There you have it.
The not-that-weird stuff about yours truly.
And since the rules say I have to tag another 6 people, I'll be more than glad to do so.

And the nominees are..............

[Calon-calon nya adalah.......]

Stupe

[since K Ruby didn't tagged you, may I take the honour...hehe..]
Deya

[curiousnya nak tau... ;)]
Shaxu

[6 je..I know you can give more but the rules said 6 only. =D]
Edwin

[can you shorten the list to ONLY 6, eD? LOL]
Zzeed

[can you come up with 6 weird stuff about yourself? I doubt it-lah..]
Nanashahir

[my dear, 6 is enough kan..ke nak lagi? hehehe..]

Till then, take care friends.
Love to hear 'some weird stuff' from all of you.
Wassalam..

3MlmTnp( * )

Assalamualaykum..

I've never realized the significance of this song until today.
As always, I cherised the lyric of any songs best while I'm driving.
And for this song it's no difference..
Man, what's wrong with me??
Wasn't I supposed to be ignorant?

+ + + + +

Fiq (Mentor) - 3 Malam Tanpa Bintang.

Kasih.. maafkan diriku
Banyak dosaku padamu
Tidak terhitung jari jemari daku
Tak dapat dibilang bagai bintang beribu
Sukarnya diriku menebus kekhilafan yang lalu

Kasih.. engkau tak bersalah
Hanya hatiku yang buta
Tulus dan ikhlas kau korban jiwa raga
Dan tanpa belas ku buat kau kecewa
Ku tahu dirimu sukar melupakan segalanya

Tiga malam tanpa bintang
Dan diriku dihimpit penyesalan
Arah tuju kian fanaKerna hilangnya manira
Bagaikan siang diselubung gerhana

Kembalikan senda tawa

Pulangkanlah manis disenyum manja
Ku pahatkan keinsafan
Dan patrikan kesetiaan
Sehingga nadi menafikan nyawa

+ + + + +

Pa'chik (and everybody)..
Please bear with me for a few more days ok? ;p
I think this won't take long..
The personality 'transition' is not that easy as it seems to be.

Psssst.. Shambie darling..
Do excuse our extremely short date last night.
So short you only managed to finish only a slice of that finger-licking papperoni dip-licious pizza.
[some more with Nuqman around and the waiter who acted like he's chasing us away..LOL!!]

Wassalam~

escapade!

Assalamualaikum.

This Friday I'm off to Pantai Tanjung Chap *[which I don't have any idea where it is..yet..] with these three beautiful ladies a.k.a my bestest of friends.

Shambie

Mizot

Aboon

Can't wait for our escapade, girls!!

Fizzy~

Assalamualaykum!!

Yesterday I got nothing to do so I Google-d "FIZZY".
My blog was tenth in the list.. (and today ninth..LOL)
But I'm not going to brag about that.

The most interesting part is I found a blog.
What's so special about it, you asked?
The blogger's name is also Fizzy.
She's from Yorkshire, United Kingdom.
And guess what, the UK Fizzy is also a Primary school teacher.
Now how scary is that?
Hehehehehe..



To Fizzy, here's to many,many great blogging days ahead..
Take care!

Wassalam~

my OCD and i an my Drug test

i guess the main reason why i can't seem to be blogging on regular basis, for a long period of time, is because i think a lot. a fellow blogger, who's now a doctor, once 'diagnosed' me with "Obsessive Compulsive Disorder" (OCD). hehehehehe. when i write, i would proof read them over and over just to make sure everything's correct. the spelling, the grammatical part of the sentences et cetera. sometimes, on a rare ocassion, i would mentally plan what i want to write that day. i would read what i've written and would picture myself as the reader..would i be interested in reading what's written there or sell me fake urine!? I think to bring thc from the body quickly fail((
It would be better to order a synthetic urine here

i needed perfection in the work i'm doing. even if it's merely a blog.. a personal one to add to that. but being a teacher i guess, i need or have to write well, if not better than my students. lol. plus i personally think that since teaching, my english is deteriorating. things have been going the other way round. it's not my students' level of english that gets better, but mine is getting worse day by day.

this was told by my lecturer [who happens to be an ex-tkcian also..], on the day she interviewed me for my PJJ course, that i need to get out from my school, because my students are making my command of english worse. hehehe. perhaps i'm not much of a exemplary teacher, that's why they are not making any grave progress. lol. but in a way, it does affect me a bit. speaking and writing wise, i'm not as confident as i used to be.

so, my point is.. this OCD thing had an effect on me as a blogger/writer. as the process becomes longer, i slowly feel lazier to write. so, this time around i'll put my foot down and just write whatever comes to my mind. without ever thinking of the correct grammar or if it's interesting enough for the readers. [but sadly i still can't compromise on the spelling part. lol]

oh, and one other thing about blog. i think it works 2-way. when i write, a reader will read. and if that reader has a blog, i will read his/hers. then the reader will leave a comment. so do i. hence, when i am not capable of doing any of those [i.e. leisurely read + comment in others' blogs], i tend to stop writing in mine too.. because i think it's not fair for them to write and write some more yet i couldn't read their entries and leave my p.o.v. to be fair, i just stop writing so that they don't have anything to comment in my blog in return.

but i guess, writing is in my blood. no matter how hard i try, at the end of the day, it still gives me a sense of satisfaction.

a SUPER WEIRD way of thinking? i think it's confirmed now i have OCD.
lol